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@ian.fowler | ■ ▲ ◌ ▼

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So you've seen her usual contract. Don't forget to leave out a glass of milk and thimble of honey and never, ever turn your back on her or your contouring will be all wrong and she'll give you an orange tan.

I've built hydraulic presses less complicated than this

Welcome to the big leagues, Orbie. It's all up from here. And by up I mean increasingly complicated games of social chess and political capital.

I got enough of that after my quarry like a decade ago, I'm good in my lowly station minding my own business and not reminding anyone I'm still alive
I can live vicariously through my boyfriend when I want to remember how much I hated it

So I shoudn't keep your name on the list for potential promotions moving forward.

not if those promotions involve politics or cameras or talking to reporters or doing anything other than actually building shit

They don't have to if that's not your bag.

thank you
wait
'keep'?
as in i'm already on it?

What can I say, Brown Recluse, you do good work and aren't a complete asshole.

I like to tell myself I'm half an asshole at best

On the scale of what I deal with? You hover at a polite 34%.

I feel like I should get that on a placard or something
maybe put it in my obituary
Ian Fowler, only 34% asshole
my mom would have been so proud

Check your desk in the morning, it'll be there.

what, I get bored in the office sometimes.

jesus christ
who among us needs to be telling the other to sleep really, at this point
not that I won't totally hang it above my desk
because I will

That's the secret Spiderman, I never sleep.

I feel morally obligated to advise you to despite being a hypocrite

I'll make you a deal. After this upcoming quarry? Then I'll sleep.

Same

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