I don't know, man, I'm actually pretty optimistic.
I mean.
My world was a shithole that would have been lucky to make it another decade, it took like three hours of prep to have a warm shower, and I was in a perpetual one-sided dick measuring contest with a guy who's wife left him for Ron with the Cow.
Also, you were super dead.
And now we're here, with taco trucks and you know people we care about
I know, you're right, but that's the problem. I don't mean to give you more to worry about, but this only lasts as long as we get lucky with the interdimensional roll of the dice; if we suddenly disappear, like people do, you're right back in your world and I'm right back in mine.
Which, point of clarification, I wasn't super dead yet in. I think I still had a good ten minutes or so.
[Which is what he's really afraid of, or is when he's registering that kind of emotion on more than surface level.
This place is a challenge, and so was Hadriel, but it's definitely better than what awaits him at home and that's what's distressing; he's much less concerned about being stuck here forever than he is about the idea that he'll leave without choosing to. And that's the same fear he has for Nate, and for Ian, and for all the other people he knows here who don't have anything waiting for them at home.]
( He tends to just kind of... block that part out. It hasn't happened to him, Kyna came back, he doesn't think about Will much anymore. It's easy to think of it like a disease nobody in your immediate sphere has — what are the odds, right? Until it happens. )
If it helps From what I remember It just started feeling like falling asleep after drinking too much
[He affirms that, because Ian's right, and it's important. For everything that's happening, and for all the setbacks, they're getting closer. It had happened like this in Hadriel too, and he has to remember that there's no reason what was achieved there can't be attained again.
As for what the rest of Ian said--]
It does help. Thank you.
[For caring enough to be willing to share something like that, especially when the experience is so recent, just to try to make the whole thing a little less terrifying for him.]
( That isn't to say it eliminates the great existential dread of dying and the nothingness which likely follows, but at least the experience itself wasn't entirely shrouded in fear and mental anguish until the very last. There just wasn't enough room for cohesive thought at the time. )
You're welcome. Schedule movie night, I think we might all actually need it.
[Since his experience consisted of the violence itself and only a few seconds of the aftermath, then suddenly waking up in Hadriel healed enough so as not to die but no more than that, what he remembers is how bad it was. How many months it took to heal, and how awful those months--especially the first one--were.
So it's... Morbid, certainly, but still a good reminder that death itself isn't so bad. Dying itself hadn't been bad for him either in the Aerie, but that had been a very different circumstance, and so it was easy to disregard it as not being applicable, but Ian's experience is closer to what happened to Lance at home and so it's more meaningful to hear.
But the fact that they can have this conversation at all means they really could use some distraction. Maybe right now, since everything is still falling down around them, but soon.]
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I mean.
My world was a shithole that would have been lucky to make it another decade, it took like three hours of prep to have a warm shower, and I was in a perpetual one-sided dick measuring contest with a guy who's wife left him for Ron with the Cow.
Also, you were super dead.
And now we're here, with taco trucks and
you know
people we care about
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Which, point of clarification, I wasn't super dead yet in. I think I still had a good ten minutes or so.
[Which is what he's really afraid of, or is when he's registering that kind of emotion on more than surface level.
This place is a challenge, and so was Hadriel, but it's definitely better than what awaits him at home and that's what's distressing; he's much less concerned about being stuck here forever than he is about the idea that he'll leave without choosing to. And that's the same fear he has for Nate, and for Ian, and for all the other people he knows here who don't have anything waiting for them at home.]
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( He tends to just kind of... block that part out. It hasn't happened to him, Kyna came back, he doesn't think about Will much anymore. It's easy to think of it like a disease nobody in your immediate sphere has — what are the odds, right? Until it happens. )
If it helps
From what I remember
It just started feeling like falling asleep after drinking too much
And it feels like we're getting closer
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[He affirms that, because Ian's right, and it's important. For everything that's happening, and for all the setbacks, they're getting closer. It had happened like this in Hadriel too, and he has to remember that there's no reason what was achieved there can't be attained again.
As for what the rest of Ian said--]
It does help. Thank you.
[For caring enough to be willing to share something like that, especially when the experience is so recent, just to try to make the whole thing a little less terrifying for him.]
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You're welcome.
Schedule movie night, I think we might all actually need it.
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So it's... Morbid, certainly, but still a good reminder that death itself isn't so bad. Dying itself hadn't been bad for him either in the Aerie, but that had been a very different circumstance, and so it was easy to disregard it as not being applicable, but Ian's experience is closer to what happened to Lance at home and so it's more meaningful to hear.
But the fact that they can have this conversation at all means they really could use some distraction. Maybe right now, since everything is still falling down around them, but soon.]
I'll let you know when I've made the plans.
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